


Pandora's Box

by StoriesAboutUs



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Pandora's Box, supergirl reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-01-31 21:59:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18600211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StoriesAboutUs/pseuds/StoriesAboutUs
Summary: Unfortunately, sometimes things don’t break, they shatter, but when you let the light in, shattered glass will glitter. Of course, it wouldn’t have shattered at all if Kara hadn’t been the one to create Pandora’s Box to begin with.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A short story about how Lena deals with finding out the truth and the bridges they have to cross to get to healing.

The flapping sound of a cape, the slight touch of something firm colliding with the floor, the power pose, all of these combined with the slightly teasing tone of the hero makes Lena shudder. “Is there any reason as to why you’re getting drunk on a Tuesday afternoon?” She wishes she never got an office with a balcony and that the sheer amount of willpower she had once before dealing with her brother and the other countless faces that have let her down (at some point or another) to be a learning experience and lets her be composed throughout this exchange.

Lena picks up the glass of whiskey up to her mouth. She tastes the liquor first, feels the sour taste and how strong it is on her tongue and then swallows almost all of it in one go. She hopes it will swallow everything she wants to say to the Superhero. It has worked before, why wouldn’t it work now? She takes the remaining content of the glass in the final sip and feels the alcohol run free on her mouth and on her body. It starts to make an effect on her but not quite the effect she wants to. She still capable of feelings and to have a proper use of English (not slurring her words is even harder when she’s under the influence).

“Is it Tuesday?” She asks, not much caring if the answer is yes. Does it really matter? There are more important things that she could be discussing right now and with more important people -like Jess or even Alex and of course Kara- but she’s here now, with the hero. The affronted look Supergirl gives her to that answer doesn’t sit right with her. It unnerves her to see the slight frown on the blonde’s face, making a prominent mark on her eyebrow stand out. It frustrates her because there shouldn’t be any sign of discomfort there, any sign that the hero cares, any sign that resembles her true identity. They don’t do this, meaning they don’t talk, they don’t confide in each other, they used to but not anymore. The hero shouldn’t even be here.

Lena is taking a break from glaring at the hero to glare at the way that without her heels (she discarded them just as she arrived at the office and now they lay askew on the carpet floor) she’s now in a disadvantage point because now that she looks at the superhero she has to look up to said Kryptonian and she swore she would never do that. She’s being childish, maybe the alcohol is taking its toll on her but that’s not the case and she just feels like she would never look at the hero the same, metaphorically and literally speaking.

“It is Tuesday, and it is two o’clock.” The blonde points out and even though she just left _in the afternoon_ part her tone of disapproval is evident enough. Lena scoffs at that. Who does she think she is to make judgements about what she’s doing? Maybe, if she probably knew the reason why she would be drinking with her or maybe drinking. Does she ever drink? What would the appropriate reaction be for a Super in those cases? Should she ask her brother what Kal-El did when Lex found out many of his secrets? She also hates the tone Supergirl used, all knowingly, when she knows that the Superhero doesn’t really care or she wouldn’t be there with her cape and flashing that crest on her chest like it made her invulnerable to the truth. The truth being, she’s just another person that for the nth time in Lena’s ‘short life’ has let her down.

Lena is glad to say that she would probably be the last, because trust once lost, is lost forever with Lena Luthor.

“I don’t care for your judgment.” They’re both pass that. There was a time when she considered Supergirls’ judgment to fair above all the rest. It all came down to the fact that if she got the Superhero to believe in her, to approve her choices as well as her decisions and her commitment to stay true to herself that she knew she could become a better person and she could finally believe that she _was not_ , _she is_ not another Luthor. But after some deliberated lies, cover ups and distrust on the hero’s part Lena did not only stopped trusting the hero, she also stopped trying so hard to prove to others that she _was good_ , she _still is_. Even though the consequences of her actions during the last few months could say otherwise, she knows she’s good but inevitable still human.

And that’s one thing that humans have that seem like the superhero was above of, flaws. The most important flaw that Lena thinks she has its emotions. Even if she put every single emotion into boxes, sometimes she couldn’t help when those boxes were full and spilling through the cracks that she made when she lets her guard down.

Now she hopes she can keep cool and collected in the presence of the two most important boxes labeled S and K. How funny how she was the most human when she was near those two.  

“But I care about you Lena.” That's a first. 

Not once has the hero said those words before. She has heard the same phrase before not just in this setting. She never had so why would she tell her that? She didn't really care for her when she first saved her on that helicopter ride (she never said so otherwise), what she cared for was the damage it could do to the Super family if she didn't save a Luthor, so no, she didn't care for her then. Time and time again when she was at peril, like first with her mother, then her brother, then human villains or alien villains, or in the hands of Kara’s boyfriend mother, and the list goes on, never once when her life was at danger or afterwards has she received the proper speech of ‘You’re ok, I saved you because I care’.

Not even mainly when the tipping point was what happened with Lex -after he destroyed every relationship she ever had- did the hero ask. So, why now? Does the blonde know about the boxes and how if she keeps insisting they’re going to be like Pandora's Box. A source of unforeseen trouble is what the Superhero was aiming for now.

“Since when?” There’s a malice chuckle after that and she doesn't need to see the blonde to know how much that hurt her. What does she take notice is that her hand instinctively reaches out for the empty glass. She refills it for the third or was it just the second time? Times passes quickly now that secrets and confessions are you doing like nectar to a bee, consuming everything around it.

The hero completely ignores her question in order to ask her what happened. Where would Lena begin? It's like where would she begin when the answer to that is where does it end, and she knows it will end with the Kryptonian, with Supergirl.

She knows there could be a simple and short answer for that.

An answer that came in the form of a letter.

A letter that haunts her and still in plain sight, just in arms reach from her desk.

But she’s not going there right now.

She can’t.

“Must there be a reason for drinking?” She asks and she adds another curt chuckle when the Superhero just fumbles with an answer or probably another question. The self-imposing figure on her right makes a rash swoop when she inadvertently pushes the bottle out by mistake and instead of reaching the ground is safely in strong hands.

“You are making it out to be.” Supergirl says and is just going great now that Supergirl must think she's drunk. The blonde carefully places the bottle at the top of the bar and she’s handling the bottle with such careful and constructed movements as if she’s treating the bottle like she’s treating her. With calculated movements that is. Lena is not even buzzed, she wants to get there and fast, but something is stopping her.

Maybe it's the fact that she could hear the conversation playing in her head over and over again that one time she was “drunk” in Sam’s kitchen while Kara was saying that she is one of the strongest women she knows and asking her why wasn't she fighting. She could come up with so many resemblances to what’s happening now and she can tell the reasons why she was not fighting then and one for she doesn't want to fight now. Maybe she's tired of fighting.

Just as Kara, Supergirl may now think that she's good and kind but that's not the real world. The real world is full of secrets and lies and Lena is getting tired of being hurt by it. “What do you want? Why are you here?” What she wants and what she expects are two different things. She wants the truth, something that the superhero will never deliver -in her own way. She expects to be lied to which in a way she will get and it's hard to separate the two versions of what she really needs.

“I was passing by and saw that you were here, alone.” Straight to the point. Not the truth exactly but it’s not a lie either. She wasn’t passing by that’s a lie, but she truly was seeing her, alone, with a tumbler of whiskey on her hand and too much time on her hands to think about the future. She didn’t want to think of the future. That’s the last thing she wants.

“And what made the impression that I wanted otherwise be engaged and judge by my activities? Or is it now that having a drink is now considered dangerous for a Super?” That isn't fair, the way she's treating the hero without giving the blonde the real reason why she's snapping at her and why she should defend herself better than just a sigh and dropping her standing power pose for a more defensive one. Her arms wide apart from her body, her hands facing inwards, just like a tamer would get with its wild animal.

What isn't fair is that Supergirl brings the unexpected truth to the conversation. “Kara was worried about you.”

“So what now? You make house calls?” Supergirl rolls her eyes and her previous pose comes back. Her defenses going haywire. “She is just worried.”

“So why isn't she here?” She has been wondering why and when will she get answers from her friend. Kara has been checked out of their friendship long before she started dating James. She had an inkling as to why then but she wants to hear from Kara what is keeping her and them apart now.

Supergirl lets out a defeated sigh. “Are you going ever to trust me again?”

She's talking about trust, she wants to go there and it makes her livid. What does trust have to do with their conversation? Well the simple answer is everything but her heart is pounding so fast her knuckles tighten, she can barely breathe and she knows what it will come down to. This is going to be the moment where everything changes. But everything has changed, only now she's just debating if it is a good or a bad change, overall this is going to be the beginning of the end. (‘Such a cliche’. Lena thinks)

“My trust once lost is lost forever Supergirl.” The superhero bites her own lip and the frown returns, making the scar visibly more apparent, her steel blue eyes waiver and the blonde lets out of a frustrated sigh. “Don't you think you are being harsh and hypocritical?” There's an edge on the hero’s tone. Her frustration is palpable and the slight dent on her floor is going to remind her of this very moment. Lena has never been called a hypocrite, many other things have been said of her and to her but never that.

“My, my, she bites.” Lena scoffs. She takes one glance at the clock noticing that they've been at it for 30 minutes and that she has to reschedule her whole afternoon.

“Lena what happened?” What’s worse is that she can see and hear how worried the superhero sounds. Her plead to tell her goes unanswered and Lena is beginning to feel restless. “Can you please just go away.  I have a business to run.” Her hands shake when she takes her tablet and she sees the background picture of her and Kara from Christmas, a candid shot taken by James.  They are side-hugging and smiling like they mean it. 

Could they do that now?

Could they smile at each other without it being hurtful?

“I just want to make sure you're okay.” She repeats, and she sounds so much like Kara and it hurts her even more because she's not really there.

“So now you care?”

“I’ve always cared.” The outburst is the final thing that makes her snap.

Her head pounds, her palms are sweating and she definitely feels lightheaded. “I've never pegged you as a liar _Supergirl_.” She makes sure that when she says her name it lays with the truth behind it because she's not talking to Supergirl anymore.

She's talking to the woman who was everything to her.

“I don't lie.” She used to find it cute, that self-absorbed and self-assured replies she would come up with. She used to make her feel like she was the only person who got the answers to everything right. Now, now Lena is going to be the one who would make her own world fall apart.

“You want to know what's wrong?” She leaves everything on the table and takes the final steps towards the hero. The blonde towers over her but she feels like she's making herself smaller sensing her fury.

“Yes.”  The hero whispers between the almost nonexistent space between their mouths. 

Lena looks into her eyes.

Into familiar blue eyes.

“What’s wrong is that your lies aren't working anymore, _Kara_.”  There’s no fight left, her demeanor changes and her Supergirl persona leaves completely and she’s left with Kara. Kara Danvers or Kara Zor-El she doesn’t know anymore.

What she knows is that their Pandora’s Box was open.


	2. Chapter 2

She says her name, not Supergirl or any other pseudonyms she would come up with, it’s her name.

Her name.

She used to love hearing her name, not because she’s vain or self-absorbed but because she loved hearing Lena say it. She loves to hear it in a whisper, or in laughter, when she’s mad or when she’s really happy, or when she’s crying (that not so much because it breaks her heart) but bottom line is that she loves to hear the way Lena pronounces the K a little bit more prominently and the r comes a little bit more forced due to the slight but still there Irish accent that Lena couldn’t quite leave behind.

So she says her name.   

Her name says more than Lena has ever needed to say, more than Kara has ever wanted to hear. Especially while wearing the suit, while acting like she was invincible (while being everything but). Her name uttered by Lena is the last and first thing she would ever want to hear without having herself revealed her true identity to her best friend. Her name says everything that happened to her in the past few years, it says everything that Kara did to her, it says everything that happened between them –it says all of that, but it doesn’t say enough to tell Kara how to respond.

What could she possibly have to say that has been already said?

The truth was out, so what was left?

Kara can’t help but feel the words –whatever they might have been- die in her throat. Looking at Lena –really looking at her, seeing the desolation behind her eyes that don’t shine anymore, seeing the hard line that her mouth has set into, seeing her closed off posture- she looks like just another light that Kara extinguished with careless words and selfish actions. She looks like a Luthor and she has only herself to blame.

How could they come back to what they were before, seeing as she was careless and selfish with Lena’s heart and by proxy her own. Because Lena had her heart in her hands and now…Now she just crushed it just like she did with Lena’s.

Lena’s watching her, and Kara can’t say anything –she’s paralyzed by fear, paralyzed by guilt, paralyzed by the memories of everything she’s ever done and the weight of those things bearing down on her bones until it suffocates her.

It feels worse than a panic attack.

It feels worse than kryptonite.

It just feels worse.

She wants to say something, say anything, say ‘ _I’m sorry for everything. I was stupid and selfish_ ’ because she was stupid not to tell Lena her secret, the truth, just everything and she was also selfish, selfish to think that she could preserve whatever they had intact without thinking that lies were just looming and ready to break everything in its path. Or maybe just say _‘I know I betrayed you and that I have to let you go if that’s what you want’_ even though that’s the last thing she would ever want. Or just say _‘I want you blame this only on me and not yourself, I want you to be happy with your life because you deserve a million times better than a broken thing that I created’_ because she knows Lena, and she knows her friend will blame herself and that it will break them. But Kara doesn’t say any of those things –she doesn’t say anything at all.  She’s just afraid that after this, they will have nothing left to say. If that’s the case then she wants to prolong this until she can’t.

“Lena, I…” Her voice breaks and Lena’s hurt expectancy turns into quieter confusion.

“I need you to leave now Kara.”

“I can’t.” Not like this. Not when she wants to say everything she has practiced multiple times in front of her mirror and in front of Alex. She can’t leave without leaving her heart in pieces and not finally whole.

“I have a business to run.” The way she says it doesn’t sit right with Kara. She’s basically telling her that her business is more important than whatever they are about to break. Because something already broke and if distance and lies are coming in after this, she will fear there will be nothing left to fix.

“Please.” Lena says forcefully while walking away towards the door to the balcony. Lena pries it open and just stays put waiting for her to leave the same way she came from.

“Lena I-“

“Kara…”

Her feet echo down the tile floor and each footstep sounds like another reminder of everything Kara fucked up. It’s the fact that she hadn’t seen it coming before everything was in tatters around her. When something breaks, if the pieces are large enough, you can fix it. Unfortunately, sometimes things don’t break, they shatter, but when you let the light in, shattered glass will glitter. Of course, it wouldn’t have shattered at all if Kara hadn’t been the one to create the Pandora’s Box to begin with.

“I love you.” Kara whispers but she’s not sure if Lena even hears her. She’s not sure if she even heard it herself and flies away. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always grateful for your comments and kudos. 
> 
> Want to try and post all of it before the finale but we'll see.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short filler but still necessary. I really hope I can finish this before the finale but inspiration hasn't come yet. We'll see. Either way, enjoy.

_‘I love you’_ The words echo in Lena’s mind all day, they settle heavily in the back of her head, eating away at her and her feelings.

Every time Lena manages to forget just for one second or even when she tries to distract herself, do something to keep herself sane, the words creep back into her thoughts, reminding her that everything she ever wanted is waiting for her. Only if she just…

She has done everything to forget about the words, the lies, the truths, the betrayal, the heartbreak but it keeps coming back, she keeps the words at bay.

She has tried.

She’s tried putting it all on boxes again but after the encounter on her office, the boxes that had piled up in her head already fell through the cracks and the box labeled Kara was open and once you open Pandora’s Box you can’t put it back together.

She has tried with alcohol, so much of it that she had to restock her office bar and her own bar at home, and the bar that she was at the other day. She has also tried to distract herself with work. But there’s so many times she could fly over to Metropolis or to the other side of the world until investors and other CEO’s demand her full attention to its headquarters. She has also tried to distract herself with other forms of enjoyment that leave her more and more empty each time she pursues them until she has nothing left to give. She hast tried and failed to catch Lex or Eve but thanks to Supergirl (Kara) and the DEO they’re already in custody and serving life sentences in the most remotely and unreachable (inescapable) part of the earth.

So even after everything was over, there was nothing left to fight for…

So when she’s at work, or when she’s flying, or when she’s having dinner with her peers or the date of the day, she always remembers what she had and what could’ve been and those words. Mostly, the word that hangs her up in that sentence, though, is the word _‘love’_. The implication there being that Kara loves her, has always loved her, maybe she always will, which is complete and utter blatant lie.

Lena loved Kara since the start, but Kara has never loved her because if she did she wouldn’t have kept the secret, she wouldn’t have lied. It was evident in every ignored text, every word not spoken, every time Kara broke Lena a little more apart with her hands, words and actions. If Kara had loved her all that time, why had she hurt her? If Kara had loved her all that time why had she walked away and left Lena behind to wonder what had she’d done wrong? (She knows she was the one to leave first but Kara never stayed) Why did she never defend herself and let her leave first? So many questions, and they all come back to the word ‘love’ and it’s completely breaking her apart, after so many months apart. 

So this, right now, is by far the worst idea Lena’s ever had and yes, she’s including all the times she trusted someone who ended being her own downfall –her mother, her brother, Kara- and also getting sort of addicted to boxes and alcohol in that list, because this is worse. This is a hundred times worse than every tear, every hangover, worse than every day spent wallowing in her own regret and self-loathing (and she could name a few more things) than this.

This is worse than all of that, because it’s Kara. But that doesn’t stop her from showing up at Kara’s apartment in the middle of the night. Whatever happens next is going to break her, one way or another.

Lena sucks in a breath, staring at Kara’s apartment door.

Is this what she wants?

Is she going to show up at Kara’s door, heart in her hands, begging Kara to finally explain to her what went wrong? But begging is such a stretch, Luthor’s don’t beg and they don’t ever do it to a Super, so Lena doesn’t want to beg and she certainly doesn’t want to grovel at Kara or Supergirl (whoever answers that door now) when she’s still angry.

So maybe this wasn’t a good idea.

So she’s turning on her heel to leave, having convinced herself that it isn’t worth it, isn’t wort humiliating herself for, when Kara’s voice whispers _‘I love you’_ , in her ear again.

The words are always looming.

_Damn her._

Lena reaches up with a trembling uncertain hand, wishing she were anywhere else, wishing she could do anything but let her hand knock on the door –maybe she won’t, and Lena can pretend that this never happened and she was never this close to pouring herself out again but then the door cracks open, and Kara peeks out. (How could she forget about the superhearing. Her heart must be going at an abnormal pace for Kara to hear her through the door).

So Kara peeks out and god she looks…human.

She looks awful, Kara’s hair is tangled and her eyes are sunken and dark, like she hasn’t slept in days. Her face is a little flushed and she has tear stains at the bottom of her cheek. She’s wearing Lena’s MIT hoodie and the blanket that Lena gave to her as a jest with the House of El symbol on it, given how much Kara liked it when they passed a store on their way to lunch one day. (Oh, the irony)

“Kara ,” Lena whispers. She meant it to be louder, more like a greeting, but her voice cracks with her heart and it comes out too quiet, too meek. She knows it doesn’t matter, Kara could hear her even at the other side of town if she wanted to (she wonders if she had on those lonely nights when she-? She can’t think about that right now).

She clears her throat and tries again. “Kara.”

“Lee-Lena.” Kara smiles weakly, but it doesn’t look like a happy smile. Lena wonders if the familiar “Lee” was on its way out of her mouth, and somehow, that manages to hurt even worse than she’s already hurt, just from seeing Kara look so broken and trying to reach for the last remains of their friendship.

Lena doesn’t want to have this conversation, doesn’t want to push herself though this and doesn’t want to bare her heart again -especially to Kara, who left it bleeding after the lie. But the broken heart from the confession is still beating inside her, still begging for answers, still crying out for anything to ease the pain and at the very least, Lena thinks she owes it to herself to finally begin to heal and to know the truth.

To know if it was her that should carry the blame and not Kara’s.

To know if Kara loved her, still loves her but in the way that Lena wants but doesn’t quite want it yet.

To know if something was real for Kara because it was real for Lena.

So Lena takes in a deep breath and asks “Can I come in?”


	4. Chapter 4

Kara’s eyes widen. She glances into the apartment behind her that Lena can’t see, frowns, and seems to consider for a long moment. Probably wondering what Lena wants then she looks back at Lena and sighs. “Please, come in.”

Lena is surprised by how Kara seems like a broken version of the Kara she used to know, and she had quickly become ‘this’. A small, quiet version of who she used to be and who she still is as Supergirl. The thought dwindles the small amount of hope in Lena’s chest even further, reminding her what was at stake when Kara told her the truth.

She doesn’t know what’s going to happen next, what does she knows is that whatever comes of this –it will break her, either way. If she has to be the one to end it all, to say no or even I don’t care for the first time to Kara, to be the one to finally choose to see that their friendship was just a ruse and to confront their real feelings for each other she’ll…fracture.

If she lets herself fall back into Kara, it will be worse. Neither outcome includes her heart still beating after the shattered pieces shine. Lena follows Kara inside, pretending the sound of Kara closing the door quietly behind her doesn’t make her feel claustrophobic, fell like she can’t breathe, feel like she can’t be able to escape if this starts going sideways. How could she when she wouldn’t even have to run before the superhero catches up to her.

“Are you ok?” Kara asks. Lena, for lack of anything to do with herself, shoves her hands in her pockets and looks anywhere, everywhere but Kara. Her eyes land on the pile of comfort food Kara has on the table. “Are you eating that alone?” Lena mumbles. Kara’s eyes soften on her and Lena can’t stand to look at her, can’t stand to see how they still ache for each other, can’t stand to see that maybe Kara really has loved her all these years.

Who gave her the right to?

“You know I’m a bottomless pit.” Kara says, her eyes so soft, and so impossibly sad but there’s something akin to hope lingering behind those –impossible not to stare- blue eyes. “But you knew that already and you also didn’t come here to talk about that. Are you ok?” Kara asks once again. Lena feels like her breath is caught in her chest. All she can do is look into Kara’s eyes and see everything she lost, everything she was too much for, every mistake she made and just stare.

Maybe they have blame to share after all.

“I need,” Lena starts, but suddenly she’s lost for words, she doesn’t know what she would’ve said, before, but she knows she has to try. So she clears her throat and starts over. “Why?” There are so many questions and she chooses to keep on focusing on the lie that started all. “Why did you lie to me?”

Kara blinks. Kara bites her lips, nervous and afraid, and Lena hates seeing that look on her face. That look that tells her Kara doesn’t feel safe, the look that means Kara would rather be anywhere else than with her, but Lena wants an answer if Kara has/or loves her since the beginning, if Kara has loved her all this time then why did she lied to her? Why did she betray her? Why did she become one of those people who had hurt her the most with lies and manipulation?

“I can’t.” Kara’s voice dies, Lena can’t stand the thought of this again –she can’t stand reliving yet another conversation from before the reveal.

“No,” Lena shakes her head, feeling the weight of the word that means so much more than just “No” –it means Lena saying ‘no’ to Kara for the first time in….a very long time and it means that she won’t take just ‘I can’t’ for an answer when it’s her heart on the line, it’s her own freaking sanity. The boxes were already open and laid bare for both her and Kara to see. Saying ‘No’ to Kara would be the first time, possibly ever that someone would say that to Supergirl.

“Tell me,” Kara’s bottom lip trembles and tears well in her eyes, which breaks Lena’s heart even more. “No matter how much the truth hurts, it’s always better than being lied to.”

She hates being hard and forceful, being the Luthor in her. She hates being anything but gentle and tender with Kara, but she needs answers. And she will not be a pliable to say anything anymore, bending under the slightest pressure. “If you say you love me, why did you lie to me for so long?” Now Kara looks shocked. Maybe she didn’t think Lena heard her when she told her or maybe she didn’t know she had said anything at all. Maybe Lena didn’t hear anything, she just imagined Kara whispering the words. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake. She is thinking that maybe the mistake was to believe that even Kara couldn’t look pass her last name, no one would ever trust a Luthor.

“I always loved you.” Kara whispers now, which confirms, at least, that Lena didn’t imagine it. And it means Kara’s talking. Lena fights the urge to interrupt, to scream, to cry and break down (well now, that’s a lie, but she would if she wanted to), so she lets Kara finish. “It was never about me not loving you or because you’re Luthor.” Even though Lena just thought of it, it shows how much Kara knows her.

“So what was it then?” Lena asks, the tears are pressuring her for release and her frustration is welling up, her throat closing with heat, and her heart is just breaking and breaking and shattering. “If you love me, you could have trusted me. Just like I did with you so many times. I’ve never had someone like you, someone who I trusted and someone who always saw the good in me even when I didn’t see it. You never let me go even when I asked you to but you kept coming back. No one has ever cared the way you did and I never cared about someone as much as I cared about you.” Lena is shaking now, everything spilling out of her that she held for so long. Kara looks like she wants to interrupt so Lena continues. “But you know the difference here is, Kara they- my mom, my brother, all of them never lied to me about who they were and what they wanted from me. You lied and I’m not sure what do you want from me now.” Kara looks down at the floor, but Lena won’t tear her eyes from Kara. She refuses. If she does, she would concede and Lena will not concede this.

She waits for Kara to say something, at least defend herself -but twenty seconds pass, and Kara’s done nothing but shake with tears. Finally, just when Lena’s frustration starts to boil over and she’s ready walk out with everything she ever cared about, broken in her hands, Kara looks at her. “It’s not about you Lena, I couldn’t talk to you. I don’t really know why, I just…couldn’t. It was heavy and hard and I wanted to, I wanted to, I wanted to every single day just to try and fix us, just because you deserved better than that, but I couldn’t. Every time I tried, I would just….I won’t even know what I would have said. There wasn’t anything to say that would make you think that I didn’t do it on purpose.” But she did end up doing it with intention. And intention is all that matters right? Kara shakes and wipes out a few fallen tears and continues.  

“It was because I wanted someone, I wanted you to see the real me and not just Supergirl. I wasn’t Kara Danvers the reporter, neither I was the beacon of hope that everyone expects from Supergirl when I was with you. I was me Kara Zor-El every single time I spent with you and the thought of losing that part of myself when I was with you terrified me. I wanted to tell you so many times, I almost did it once but you told me that I was the only person you could trust not to hurt you and I was scared out of my mind to know that I was just another one of them and that I would lose you if I did.”

She understands now, it was never about her, she was blind to see that this wasn’t about trust or loyalty or that another person she loved lied to her, hurt her. It was about Kara being afraid of losing another part of herself by telling her secret to the one of the most important people in Kara’s life. She could understand the fear of losing Kara and she was about to if she didn’t push to seek out answers to finally feel free, so now that she’s here she won’t make Kara’s fears or hers (for that matter) to come true.

There are many things still left unsaid, they have so many things to discuss but now, now that Lena knows that she already made the right decision she only needs to finally accept the truth and the truth is that no matter how hard it was, nothing would be as harder as not telling Kara that she forgives her and that she loves her too.

“You said you loved me Kara.”

“I love you Lena.”

“Then don’t you think we could’ve been okay if you told me before it was too late?”

“When did you think it was the appropriate time to tell you? When Cadmus was after you? When Lex almost killed you? When Reign almost killed me? And it wouldn’t make a difference either because I know you love me but not the way I would hope you do.”

“But what if I did, what if I do.”

“So what does that mean?”

Lena knows the answer to that, it’s easy and simple.

“I love you Kara.” The silence that encompasses the room is unfathomable and Lena can’t take it, she knows now that some things are meant to be broken and some things are meant to last even if there are cracks and patches and cover ups all over. This while is not perfect, it belongs to them. The box labeled Kara is the only box in her mind that remains open and ever so slowly has become the most real thing that Lena can feel.

And she knows what she feels for her best friend and has always known.

“And I forgive you.”

A lie and a secret are two different things, Lena has learned that and now, now she just wants the lie that separated them and the secret to come together and make the final pieces whole.

They love each other.

They’re going to be ok.

It’s going to be a long road ahead.

It’s going to be hard but at least they have each other.

And since then on Pandora’s Box was closed again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the continued support for this little fic I made while going thru writers block. While I don't feel like a 100% happy with the outcome I made for this I would gladly stand by it and maybe in the future I would do a companion piece with actual Supercorp relationship in it. This was just a character study in a way.   
> Once again thank you and see you soon for more to come.

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts are appreciated!


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